Opening Up the Clam Shell: Birthday Musings on My Journey from Birth to Death

Why do I do my Vocal Sound Healing work? What motivates me? How does the adage “We Teach What We Most Need to Learn” Work in My Life?

When I was a child I made a decision to take care of others with unconditional love and acceptance, and bury my own vulnerability. I shut down my Soul’s Voice. My sisters gave me the nickname of “Clam,” And my high school friends gave me the nickname of “Rock.”

At 27 when I was in my Master’s program in Counseling Psychology, I discovered the concept of one’s Persona…(how we want others to perceive us and how we want to perceive ourselves). I discovered specific versions of how the Persona shows up in me: the “Hero,” “Savior” and “Lover” Archetypes. I realized then that I wasn’t who I thought I was, that beneath the veneer of helping and loving others, I had what I considered unacceptable feelings of anger, fear, rage, etc., and that I had been living a lie. Ever since 27, I have been living into my commitment to un-cover and accept ALL of the underbelly of my Psyche, what Carl Jung calls the “Shadow” Archetype. This process requires courage!

My whole awakened adult life has been about opening up that Clam Shell, Being Present to the tenderness inside, and Reclaiming my Voice in relationships and in the World. The more I attend to my inner world’s depth, including the uncomfortable emotions, the more that I can authentically guide others with self-love to learning from the sometimes dark inner world. A Clam shell cannot be forced open, as our more vulnerable emotions cannot be forced out. The conditions have to be correct to support the clam to open–within ourselves and when working with others. Unconditional love and delicate respectful skill are required to support the soft inner feelings to emerge. With acceptance, we can come to Wholeness and Greatness of our Spirit’s Expression.

On today, my Birthday, I re-commit to holding all of who I am with tender love, as I journey from Birth to Death, being willing to open to and love my unknown self, which strengthens and encourages me to share my Gifts I am to give in this lifetime! Love and Blessings to All! Gwendolyn

2 thoughts on “Opening Up the Clam Shell: Birthday Musings on My Journey from Birth to Death”

  1. We all seem to have a journey in this time on earth. Some of us are focused for the love of mankind . Your voice is special in your journey of life. I am blessed to see you work and spread the love

  2. Happy Birthday Gwendolyn! Sending lots of loving birthday wishes to you! Thank you for sharing your gifts!

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